“Psychologists say we should have a number of major, long-range goals to have a healthy, fulfilling life. In addition, we need some medium-range goals with specific dates in mind for achieving them.” My questions for psychologists are these. “What’s the point? Accomplishment for accomplishment’s sake? If I got hit by a bus tomorrow, how would it matter what I have accomplished?” To say I don’t value my accomplishments would be a lie, but there is a sort of emptiness to them as well. I am one person on a planet of 7 billion other people. What’s the point? It’s not really my question, but that’s as close as I can get. My question is so much bigger than that, I don’t even know how to put it into words.
I work hard to pump money into my material existence and I am left with a lack of meaning. The pervasive question is “What’s the point?” This has been my question for a very long time. Although I thought I had figured out how to be happy, it seems that I am missing something. The question is still there. This is not a whiney helpless sort of “what’s the point?”, it is a true quest to discover why am I on the planet. I set goals, I have good accomplishments, I like my work, I have good support, great people and lots of love in my life, but I am still looking for something.
The above mentioned psychologists may have it figured out for most people, but there are some pretty significant cracks in the plan, into which I am sure I am not the only one who has fallen. Who are the guides for the rest of us?
Showing posts with label fulfilment. Show all posts
Showing posts with label fulfilment. Show all posts
Sunday, November 27, 2011
Wednesday, June 8, 2011
Energy
One of my biggest energy drains occurs when I am in conflict with myself. It seems to me that we build our lives and realize that many of the things we have engaged in do not have value that we thought they would. They lack that ‘something’ that brings meaning and fulfilment.
I look at my life and want it to be an expression of myself - the things, the things I do and my accomplishments. When life wasn't - when it was something that happened to me (or so I thought) - I was deeply unhappy. Until I understood more about who I was, I couldn't find a way of being that felt congruent. It makes sense; congruency is relative. If I don’t have a starting point (me) there is nothing for something else to be congruent with. The simplest things can be the hardest to realize. It always starts with me; this life is mine to fashion in my own vision and the more I discover about myself, the better it gets.
To figure this out to the degree I have (I certainly don’t have it all figured out), the questions were simple (as in ‘uncomplicated’ not as in ‘easy’). Who am I, and how do I define myself? As I stripped away the layers of body, activities, behaviours, emotions, baggage, relationships, etc., I found my self in the time before thought. I found that my self is actually a state of peace and certainty. That took a while, but what helped me find me was focusing on the things that made me feel good - part of a job, specific types of interactions and certain activities. I analyzed, reorganized and looked for new ways to do things so that I would feel happier, more fulfilled by how I spend my time. In doing so, I had more energy. This is on my mind today because I have a friend whom I think might be on the brink of burn-out. She is very resilient, resourceful, determined and hard-working, but sometimes to her own detriment. She is starting to talk about seeing a cycle, but there is more to than that... but there are many things you should not say to someone until they provide some indicator that they are ready hear, and maybe see things from another perspective. Even then, it is sometimes better to let people do their own thing….as a result, I have a lot on my mind.
I look at my life and want it to be an expression of myself - the things, the things I do and my accomplishments. When life wasn't - when it was something that happened to me (or so I thought) - I was deeply unhappy. Until I understood more about who I was, I couldn't find a way of being that felt congruent. It makes sense; congruency is relative. If I don’t have a starting point (me) there is nothing for something else to be congruent with. The simplest things can be the hardest to realize. It always starts with me; this life is mine to fashion in my own vision and the more I discover about myself, the better it gets.
To figure this out to the degree I have (I certainly don’t have it all figured out), the questions were simple (as in ‘uncomplicated’ not as in ‘easy’). Who am I, and how do I define myself? As I stripped away the layers of body, activities, behaviours, emotions, baggage, relationships, etc., I found my self in the time before thought. I found that my self is actually a state of peace and certainty. That took a while, but what helped me find me was focusing on the things that made me feel good - part of a job, specific types of interactions and certain activities. I analyzed, reorganized and looked for new ways to do things so that I would feel happier, more fulfilled by how I spend my time. In doing so, I had more energy. This is on my mind today because I have a friend whom I think might be on the brink of burn-out. She is very resilient, resourceful, determined and hard-working, but sometimes to her own detriment. She is starting to talk about seeing a cycle, but there is more to than that... but there are many things you should not say to someone until they provide some indicator that they are ready hear, and maybe see things from another perspective. Even then, it is sometimes better to let people do their own thing….as a result, I have a lot on my mind.
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